This is not a news blog. I don’t post clips and rarely become topical but I have to do this today. I am quite overwhelmed by this:
Quite frankly, I think Sir Peter has misnamed the film. It should be called AFTT – A Farewell to Thorin. Well, at least the trailer gives that impression. What a feast for Thorin lovers this is. All the images of Thorin in this trailer are just simply beau-ti-ful! I had goosepimples from the beginning to the end, and on the basis of that I can already say that I will probably have to be removed from my seat in the cinema with a blow torch on account of being frozen all over. It simply looks epic, battle scenes included, and I suspect that PJ’s 48 fps gimmick will really come into its own in this final instalment of the Hobbit trilogy.
And as if the epicness of the trailer didn’t make me tearful enough, I then come across Armitage’s tweet from last night.
— Richard Armitage (@RCArmitage) November 6, 2014
What a dear man. Do all stars do this kind of thing, thanking their director and producers and giving credit with such kindness? The “Love Rich” (sic – Richard, you really have to brush up on your punctuation! I mean, I have no problem following your command to love you, but I suspect you had a different message in mind) had me in bits! Mr A may have copped on to the power of Social Media self-promotion, but he does it with such deflecting kindness that my cynicism regarding marketing is shot to pieces… I never react to RCArmitage’s tweets, but this time I could not help but click “favorite”…
Like so many fans, I am torn between grieving over the impending end of the trilogy, and not being able to wait for it. It will be hard to watch Thorin
xxxxxxxxxxxxx [censored for spoiler] but he will xxxxxxx the most
On that note, I am also ringing in another round of Thorin-appreciation with the continuation of the Fans Wax Lyrical series. Thorin has not only nose, he also has ear 😉
Ode to the Ears by Hedgehogess (and Guylty)
Majestic ears hold high the crown
without the two, it would fall down.
The crown, lying ’round kingly neck?
All dwarves will think: “Oh, what the heck?!
Our King is looking really strange!
What’s wrong with him, is the deRAnged?”
So strong those ears, nothing compares
the crown sits fast, cushioned by hairs.
It is, however, such a shame
that ears are hidden – oh how lame,
for in the event of snogging scandals
they provide two perfect handles.
Oh yes, it is indeed a shame
to hide those ears under the mane!
Maybe there’s a reason to hide
them out of women sight?
To keep them out of their reaches?
They let the girls all think of peaches.
Women admire well-formed fruits
but realise they drive them nuts.
So their gaze wanders up his back
till they reach the Kingly neck.
His Majesty’s wild strong mane
they grab both gently and insane,
and tie it into a pony tail –
the lust for ears once more prevail’.
The beauty, now for all to see,
makes weak a lot of women’s knees.
They want to pet, to lick, to bite,
whatever serves the King just right.
They’ll do it all enthusiastic,
because – let’s talk here realistic:
His Majesty’s majestic ears
let ovaries go up in flares.
Ode to Thorin’s Ears by Kathy Jones
Those hidden ears of twin perfection,
His flowing locks prevent detection.
Would his ears respond to a gentle nibble?
I am drawn to them like dogs to kibble.
Just a glimpse, here and there,
Peeking out from tons of hair.
Passion makes them blush so red,
They glow in the dark, so it is said.
Alas, I fear we can never be sure,
From fond assaults his ears are pure.
Perhaps a peek of just one shell-like ear,
Would be enough to give us cheer.
For Thorin’s ears remain elusive,
Shy, hidden and quite reclusive.
Hiding beneath his long extensions,
They display hermit-like pretensions.
His ears are tempting, this is so.
I must seek comfort in Manilow.