Catching two birds with one stone today. I have an important question to ask at the end of this post. So if you
understandably don’t give a rat’s arse about my changing attitude towards RA, jump to the bottom!
H – How has your attitude to RA changed over your time as a fan?
Most fans probably agree with me that being a fan specifically of one particularly person, is a little bit like being in a relationship. Even though it is essentially one-sided. But with familiarity comes… contempt, as the old saying goes. Ah, no, that is probably a bit strong. The typical fan journey is pretty much this:
There’s the typical development from “crushing on” to “in love with”, which I pretty much went through myself. Total immersion and infatuation with RA at the beginning, still slightly sheepish about this “immature” interest in someone I don’t even *know*. Then acceptance and happy discourse about him. But I’d probably add 5B to the above textbook description of fangirling: “accepted but spark is gone”. Sounds very negative, but I don’t mean it like that.
Likening the fangirl experience to a RL romantic involvement, it is the phase where your interest in your OOA has been firmly cemented – but the infatuation phase is over and you are “emancipating” yourself from the object of your admiration. I used to identify with a lot of things that RA did and said, and was ready to defend or support anything he did and said. Keyword “APM”. Maybe as a way of proving to myself that we have something in common. Over the years, that need (of congruence) has become less important, not least because over time it has become clear that there is no way of *knowing* RA just on the basis of his performances, his role choices, his public appearances, his occasionally voiced opinions, or the compliments of his colleagues. My logical conclusion was to realise that I can be a fan without having to agree with him on everything he does and says. I have also developed a certain distance, based on the realisation that the person I so admire, is on the one hand a figment of my imagination, yet on the other hand is also a *real* person whose attitude to the fan circus is ambiguous at best.
So basically a change from “infatuated” to “respecting”. I still love his performances, I generally like the way he conducts himself at public occasions, I like the glimpses of his personality he shares in his tweets and interviews. He’s still holding my interest, his voice and looks still appeal to me, and hell yeah, I still would love to sit down with him and talk. But not to fawn and to swoon, but to challenge and argue. I think my inner teenage fangirl has grown up…
⍨ 💞 ⍨
Re. Birthday Auction
And now for my request for feedback: Andrea Numellote asked me BTS whether I was planning another birthday auction this year. And I am unsure – but would love your comments/feedback on this issue. Here’s my thinking: I am more than happy to organise another fundraising auction on the occasion of RA’s birthday. Not least because in the two previous years we raised $1,750 in 2016 and $1,900 in 2017 for good causes. But there’s a little snag. As in previous years, I sent a few pictures to RA with a request for signatures, earmarked for future auctions. Unfortunately I did not receive anything back. (The letter was sent last December.) So, no autographs to auction off (and I had so much counted on them, having already bought some beautiful frames to present them in 😥). The question is – is there a demand for a charity auction with other items such as fan art (RAPS for instance, or I could throw in some items made from my stash of themed fabrics) and signed/unsigned programmes? Please take the poll and add your opinion in the comment box below.